kkkaraoke

Stephen King: News and the Day I Scared Him

In Uncategorized on January 17, 2018 at 5:29 am

Hot off the press, much of Stephen King’s original works held in  a basement in Bangor, were destroyed by a flood when the main pipeline broke.

Autobiographically speaking, one of the most unusual things which happened to me concerned Stephen King, the master of mystery, horror, and suspense.

In 1998, I was employed at George Jewell Catering Company, Chicago, the caterer to the stars. I was the Human Resource Director for Human Development. He wanted me to hire regular part-time employees, than to have temps from the agencies. We started an “elite” tuxedoed staff, as he had when he worked for the Queen of England in the palace. Our clientele were like Prince Charles and Princess Diana.

One day, my co-worker asked me to do him a favor. He said that on our property at the Harold Washington Library in Chicago, on the top floor, Stephen King was going to do his first book talk for his novel “Bag of Bones.” My partner hired a professional actress to scare the audience, since the company wanted to do this big time. Although King had published many other books, he never had a book talk and signing. He’s more of a recluse. Scary authors, really are scared. The actress who my partner hired, was called at the last minute to audition for a big comedy show in Chicago.

He asked me to take her place. I wasn’t into costumed karaoke yet, and was conservative. He said I’d have to go to the library and scare the audience. I’ve never said “no” to a boss, but this time I was hesitant. I asked him if I could rent a costume. Stephen King was my son’s favorite author, and I knew the writer was full of suspense. My partner approved and I only had about two hours to buy the costume and make up some kind of act to scare the audience.

When I arrived at the costume shop, I asked for a costume like a Bride of Death. I had no idea what the book was about, but I thought I’d do a skit where I come back from the grave to marry Stephen King. I then would take him back with me to the spirit world for eternity.

It was the creepiest gown. It looked as if it were taken off a woman who was buried in a coffin for centuries and was decomposing on the fabric. It was greenish, torn, and eaten through by worms. The bridal veil looked like spider webs and the bouquet was filled with dead black flowers. I’m an artist so my makeup was spooky with muddy shades of greens, purples, blues, and white for highlighting.

When I got to the library, I had a few minutes. There was a narrow corridor, which led to the back of the ninth floor. I began practicing my shtick. “Stephen King-a, this is Ing-a and I’ve come to get you.” I screeched a wicked witch’s howl which echoed my voice successfully because of the marble and granite floors and walls.

I did this several times running up and down the hallway. The last time, as I ran in my Bride of Death costume toward the back wall, I saw several people walk by at the end of the hall. It was time for me to scare the audience and Stephen King, so when I arrived at the end of the hall, I stopped to use the ladies room. (They didn’t have one for witches or spirits.)

When I opened the door to return, I was confronted by the Chicago Police Department. They looked serious and I knew they meant business. I asked them what was going on?

The sergeant said, “What are you doing here?”

I said, “I was hired to scare Stephen King.”

He replied, “You’re lying. Stephen King is the one who made the 9/11 call!”

I imagined myself in a prison cell with my Bride of Death gown on and no one to bail me out. Worse, to go in front of the Chicago judge the way I looked.

I then said to the police, “Let’s go into the kitchen. I hired the chef and he’ll tell you who I am.”

Well, when we got to the kitchen, the chef said he never saw me before in his life. My costume and makeup was so convincing I fooled him. But it wasn’t funny at this point being escorted around by the men in blue. I reminded the chef who I was and when he heard my normal voice he told the police I was from Human Resources! Whew!

Well, my manager was impressed. Even though the police said I couldn’t go 75 feet near King, I could still scare the audience. No one prepared me in life for these spontaneous happenings. I had the chefs make me up a fancy glass, which had blood in it made with corn syrup and red food coloring. I lifted it and headed for the audience. First time in my life and not even a rehearsal.

When it was time, they opened up the French Doors for , and I began running through the audience screaming and cackling like an insane maniac from the underworld. I cackled to the audience I wanted to marry Stephen King. Where was he? Did they see him? Go find him for me. I love him and I would make him mine forever and take him away with me. I then pretended to drink the blood and said if Stephen did, he’d become a spirit too and could leave the earth with me for eternity.

I was only supposed to be on for a few minutes, but they didn’t call me back yet. I then  began to walk down the center aisle and pretended I was in my wedding march in the auditorium. I hummed the bridal chorus with my corpse wedding gown. When I got to the end of the aisle, I turned to the audience. I then out of nowhere, changed my tactics. I said to the audience, there was another “King” I had with me for eternity. That “King” was Elvis. I knew the girls would eat their hearts out knowing I had him with me forever!

On the spot, I then began singing acapella an Elvis song, (and I never sang before in front of people) “Are You Lonesome Tonight?” But I changed the lyrics which described a play, “Act I was when we met.” I then made the song sound as if it were about a book, “Chapter I was when we met.” The audience played along and was entertained. I also changed the words as if I were singing to Stephen to come back to me. I’ll put the Elvis video and lyrics below. Lyrics like, “Stephen, you wrote your lines so cleverly.”  “Then came Chapter 2. You seemed to change, you acted strange, and why I’ll never know.”

Well, I left to a cheering audience. Not bad for the Human Resource Director of Human Development. Since I couldn’t go near Stephen King, I went back to my manager. I asked him if I could buy the book, Bag of Bones, and could he have Stephen King sign it for my son who was in sixth grade. He not only got the approval, but I got to stand in line with the people waiting to buy the book. When it was my turn, I faced Stephen King at the desk and got my $20 bill out. I still was “The Bride of Death.” Both he and his manager stood up and came around the table. They both shook my hand and I was delighted.

It’s not quite the end of the autobiographical story. I read the book, Bag of Bones. It was about a dead bride under the main character’s bed. It was also sort of racial.

Here’s my costume and the book cover Bag of Bones: I used it for Halloween Costumed Karaoke at Bill’s on the Strip.

This is my own version of the costume, since I had to return the rented one. As you can see on the floor I have a goblet of blood. The gown is one a waitress gave me. I burned up patches and gave it a spooky hue of green blotches covering it. I sprayed an old veil with the same ghoul green, and had an ugly grey web-like hair piece on. I had a woochie on with a bloody wound on my forehead.

Yes, I’ll always remember the day I scared Stephen King. Who could have prophesied, twenty years later, I would have completed my own book. It was a horror book all right. But it’s not fiction. It’s my autobiography!

Below are the videos referring to the songs I sang above, and the news link which was posted just 5 hours ago below.

Here’s the song I hummed down the aisle. This sure was a good act, since my nature is more sweet and romantic.

Image result for bag of bones

 

(This was also an email)

It’s said in writing, the ps is the most important.

As I described the day I scared Stephen King as the Bride of Death in Chicago, (but he scared me even more) I wrote I hummed the Bridal Chorus when I walked down the aisle for his book signing.

What I didn’t know, is the song was written by Adolf’s favorite musician: Richard Wagner.

I read the book by Hitler’s friend,

The young Hitler I knew
Book by August Kubizek

Inline image 1

You see, I read the books about Hitler written by his secretary who loved him. He was like a father to her and better than any boss she had. There were 10 other women interviewing to be his secretary. When it was her turn, she was scared, and she failed the typing test. He comforted her like a father and told her she can take it again. All his employees were like that.

August wrote he met Adolf at a Wagner concert. Hitler was an artist and didn’t make a lot of money. When he bought his weekly ticket, he had to stand behind a pillar. His friend, August, both the other ticket where he too stood behind a pillar.

The other Hitler books were about children, families, babies. It’s through these eyes I see him. And oh yes, Mama would have approved. Hitler stood up to the Jews. Autobiographically speaking, what I didn’t know when I married my veteran, was when he was in grammar school he too stood up to a Jew. My husband went to a mostly Jewish school. Whatever a certain Jew did to my husband, my husband beat up the Jew ever day after school. The Jew got even of course with his Jewess mother’s scheme. She arranged for her Jew son to take away the affections of my husband’s father. Even when his Dad was in the hospital and died, the Jew was sitting next to him. The Jew didn’t have to go to Vietnam. He got a gravy job in the office in Alabama and became a millionaire. He got to go home to Chicago on the week-ends. From what I can make out, he was screwing my husband’s first fiance, who then sent my husband, then single, a Dear John letter!

Sister Rose also was treated so badly at a mostly Jew school, she ran out crying and never graduated 8th grade. Jews can be cruel. I know, I was in kindergarten, she picked me up, we left school we went home. I had to quite kindergarten. When I went to first grade at a Catholic Christian school, I failed first grade, which was very traumatic and hard to over come. I was too poor to have a paper and pencil many times. How I write today is a miracle!

https://bangordailynews.com/2018/01/16/business/original-stephen-king-manuscripts-among-items-ruined-by-downtown-water-main-break/

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